Most Divorce lawyers will tell you that as the New Year starts that it also kicks off the divorce process for many of their new clients. The holidays have passed. Kids are back in school. Reality starts to set in again. But, does the Christmas holiday season really cause divorce?
Holidays can be healing for a relationship. People’s thoughts can refocus to what is really important. Minor annoyances can be overlooked or forgotten. However, Christmas or other holidays cannot fix major problems.
The holidays can magnify major problems that are already present. Families are in close quarters for extend periods of time. There are additional stressors in hosting or attending events and parties. And there can be stress that is self-imposed from trying to create a perfect holiday. (See Clark Griswold in Christmas Vacation)
Four of the biggest causes of divorce
- Parenting styles
- The couple’s division of labor
- Financial concerns
- Perception of or actual infidelity
Any one of these or a combination of these causes can be present during the holidays. Children are home from school. Parenting style issues easily can arise during Christmas shopping or handling family holiday traditions.
Deciding how to divide the duties of cooking, cleaning, gift wrapping, spending time with family, and day jobs all can cause strain on a relationship during the holidays.
Financial subjects can be a problem at any point during the year, but during the holidays they are at the forefront even more. Buying presents, having parties, or covering the cost for holiday traditions can stretch a family’s budget.
Because schedules can be altered considerably during the holiday season. If there are already suspicions of infidelity, any departure from the norm can be looked at with suspicion. And if there is truly infidelity going on, there are divided loyalties that can wreak havoc in a person’s psyche.
Christmas and other holidays can intensify a family’s situation. Many of the leading causes of divorces are compounded during the perfect storm of the holidays. Understanding those source of the problems may help couples to find ways to address the issues without ending up in divorce court.
If you feel you may be moving toward a divorce, it may be beneficial to talk to MaryAnn Kildebeck. From minor annoyances to major problems, it is sometimes helpful to speak with a neutral professional. To assess the level of need you have and to work toward some solutions, call MaryAnn to schedule an appointment at (972) 377-6400.